stop talking about that!

Oh, how I hate, despise, abhor the conversation I just had. Talks about lost & losing someone close to you is like visualizing losing a limb, losing one of your senses, only far, far worse.

Now, do I just go to bed, pretending to try to sleep (which I know perfectly well I can't) or do I hit the shower to drown this wretching sobs?

The choice is obvious, aint it?

w.r.i.t.t.i.n.g f.r.o.m t.h.e h.e.a.r.t

I have been inspired to write again recently, To properly write, from the heart, from the depth of my soul.

For the past week I've been doing a bit of it, just a few lines here and there but they are too private to share, too personal.

I'll try to get the juice flowing & maybe someday someone will be able to share them with me.

Here's to those who inspire me, you know who you are.

BBQ Recipe

Athene’s BBQ Sauce Recipe

Ingredients

 1000 ml tomato ketchup - one of those in packet should fine

1 cup store bought bbq sauce* - preferably something with smoky in it’s name (optional)

1 cup chili sauce – time clear all those not too tasty one

1 kg of onion – diced coarsely

10 cloves of garlic - smashed

3 green apple – skinned + coarsely grated

½ cup apple cider vinegar

½ cup brown  sugar – packed

2 bay leaves

1 tsp. mustard powder

1 tsp. nutmeg

1 tsp. paprika

½ tsp. cinnamon

1 tsp. herb of choice – I use rosemary if it’s for lamb, otherwise thyme/oregano or Italian mix is ok

1 cup of cola

2 cups of h2O

Salt to taste

Oil for sautéing

Steps

Heat oil. Sauté onion + garlic until translucent, add the grated green apple. Stir until apple is soft. Add bay leaves + all the dried herbs. Cook until aromatic, making sure they don’t stick to the pot.

Pour in the ketchup + sauce if you are using. Add vinegar + brown sugar. Mix well. Add water & salt. Cook until it boils.

Turn down the heat to a simmer, add cola. Gently simmer until the sauce thickens + does not taste very acidic anymore, occasionally stirring to make sure it doesn’t stick to the pot, scraping the sides as you go. This usually takes about 1 ½ hours.

Correct the taste, adding more salt if required.

Remove from heat. You may want to remove excess oil at this point. Cool sauce.

Freeze for long time storage up to 3 months since that is a lot of sauce!

*if you happen to have liquid smoke in your ladder, lucky you, use it!

BBQ Ribs

Ribs should be at least 3 bone sized. Place ribs in a pot, fill with water until it’s barely covering the rib. Add ¼ cup of bbq sauce to every kg of ribs. Cook on high heat. Once boiling, turn to a simmer. Cover pot, cook until tender, depending on how much you are cooking, this can take anything from 2 hours to 4 hours. Remove meat from liquid, reserving some to add to the bbq sauce used for basting.

BBQ Chicken

Place cleaned chicken in a pot, barely cover with water. Add ½ cup of bbq sauce to every kg of chicken. Cook on high heat. Once it reaches boiling stage, let it boil for about 3, then remove pot from heat. Leave chicken to cool down in the liquid, this way the meat won’t dry out + remain juicy.

To BBQ

Reheat bbq sauce. Add some stock left over from the boiled meat. Simmer until thick again.

Setup your grill. When the coal turns to ember, put on the meat, grilling until it sizzles + golden. Turn once. Baste with sauce. Repeat as many time you wish, I triple-baste.

Serve hot. Bon appetit.

So what's your internet history, how has it touch your life?

15 years ago next month, I got my 1st email & internet account with Jaring. The 1st person I emailed was Redza at  Columbia Uni, NYC.

So much has happened since then, I learned email, websurfing, IRC. Met someone there, dated my soulmate & got hitched to him within 7 week. It's been wonderful & I enjoy every second of it & am looking forward to what else the net has to offer. What triggered all this trip down memory lane you may ask? I just found my old Celine Dion- Falling Into You CD & it's playing on the stereo now. That CD & Radio Music was my constant companion during all those late nite chatting.

*the top part was supposed to be a status update, but as usual I got carried away, so here's a note*

I wonder what ever happened to my old Undernet #warung, #mamak, #penang pals now, the few I'm in touch with has done very well for themselves - jpg & onedge. So where's diZz, joelabi, scopenk, drag, landlord, itik, che, soon, tab, tabdad + those Cardiff kids that used to troll Malaysian #channels to release exam tension (a million apologies for banning Cardiff IP that few times :Þ) And then there was Tening who sent me a postcard from every city in Europe she traveled to during summer despite having chatted in #mamak only a few times - mananged to finally hook up with her on FB in '10.

I was a self-proclaimed internet addict, finally weaned myself by going net-free at home for a year back in 97' while settling down to married life! Missed a few net fads, some much regretted, other gladly.

1998-2001 was the newsgroups years, met many wonderful intellects in soc.cul.malaysia that really broaden youthful my mind, Ahmad Sayuthi, a big fan of Pink Floyd and who's just tied the knot with his soulmate , here a big hiho to you.

'Refomasi' years came & went, it triggered my interest in local politic in ways never imagined by people around me. Then on to blogging where I got to 'know' and became followers of Pokku & his children, Kak Teh, Mak Andeh, PakPayne, Atenah, Elly, Awang Goneng, Rocky Brew, Kickdefella, MGG Pillai, SakMongkolAK47, Marlinda & Thea, Mamasita-Mamamia, MM's Ranting plus many more - ah... the list is endless.


Didn't bother much with social networkings, Yahoo group was just for high school group, a hit& miss with Friendster. Then Facebook got me end of 07'! It rekindled numerous friendships from RRGS (1), MRSMBP, college days, IRC, newsgroup & I found many long lost relatives. I made friends with so many more and got to know my idols from blogs personally.

I now blog occasionally, sometimes tweet, Facebook almost *uhuk* daily, do internet banking & shopping, have an online business, using Streamyx at home. Use my mobile wifi/3G for emails, surfing and ermm... the tiniest amount of Facebook *wink* when on the road.

It's been 15 years for me, and YES I'm still an addict, and NO I will not give it up again, EVER!

So what's your internet history, how has it touch your life?

My hunky new gardening assistant

The lil' man just love 'helping' out in the garden - him making more of a mess and me winding up with extra work, but what's not to love such youthful enthusiasm.



This is his so called 'Out on a Nepenthes Expedition' shots. Look at how big he's grown. And there's loads of ideas in that bald head of his!

Disclaimer : No pitcher or pitcher plants was sacrified during filming. The same can't be said about Jeddah's moneyplants though. Errk... :Þ

Dewy and enticing, just don't forget it's sticky too

I've lost all senses on my body.

Been pinching my self black and blue but nothing's happening.

Looks like this is one nightmare I'm not waking up from soon.

The choice has been made, it's the matter of living with it, not just for the day but for a real long time.

Realizing that you've bitten more than you can chew changes nothing.

Live with it! No regret.

I know I have to, even though it wasn't my choice.

Jejak Awang Goneng / GUiT Trail

@ 8.45pm on Galeri Perdana, RTM1, nightly from Monday 28 January 2008 to Thursday 31 January 2008.

More details after I speak to KakTeh in the morning.

Update :

Just back from GUiT blog, Awang Goneng wrote:

"GUiT Trail on TV

Awang Goneng will be following the GUiT trail on Galeri Perdana, RTM1 starting Monday 28th January. It will be shown in 4 parts, on 4 consecutive nights. We did the trail over two hot days in Kuala Terengganu, looking for the beluda, meeting old friends and making new ones, and going back to old places that I once knew."

For Sir AG's full account, read here.

Don't miss it!

And that's my little "Uncle Fester" on his 7 month's birthday @ Mom's 49th's Birthday!

Snapshots of Growing Up in Trengganu

I got my GUiT!!!! I got Growing Up in Trengganu!!!

Tricked my other half into meeting some friends @ Gurney for lunch - reason? MPH apparently still have some copies of GUiT!

When I first asked for the book, the salesperson looked clueless, asking me to check with customer service insted. Then I remembered what Amir said about them being @ the Hot Pick shelves. There were only 4 copies left, we bought 2 (one a gift for a friend) and guess what I did next?

Hehehehe *evil grin* I moved the remaining 2 from the bottom shelf to the top shelf! Perfect eye-level. Moved some of Tunku Halim's too *more grin, sheepish this time*

The thrill of it all almost made me wish getting caught so that I can question why books by local authors are placed way at the bottom shelves, and we are talking about books on the best-seller list here!

Also got a couple of Tunku Halim's :) My friend swiped them both from the shopping bag while I was busy with the camera guy. Hey I want my books back!

I couldn't wait to start on the tales of Awang Goneng, dear KakTeh's partner in crime so I was flipping through it on the journey home, bad idea. I know perfectly well that I can't read in any moving vehicle, so I'm now feeling 'melugai'

The new camera been acting strangely. Whenever I attempt to transfer photos from the xD -card, only about half of the photos works while the rest of the files end up corrupted. After that, the card won't work anymore, I need to have it formatted. Lost lots of photos, mainly from the 2 events - the 'very secretive dinner' and the 'last minute sport event'! Alamak, I hope the others bothered to snap some shots during the 'do's

The camera guy offered to replace the card with a new one , we tried our luck and asked for an SD instead, and he agreed! And he offered a 2GB + 1GB SD Card in replacement to the 2GB xD-card, no extra charge! It must be our lucky day.

KakTeh, we are going to to Trengganu day after tomorrow, shall bring the book along to 'tayang'.

How he has grown in 150 days....

More updates later.

By the way, a belated Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri to everyone, I know it's kinda late but it's the thought that counts right?

Utusan Malaysia - 4th July 2007 (Page 4)

The funeral went without a hitch. Tearful congregation of his loved ones and former students sent him off with highest respect, very appropriate for a man of his stature.

One of his former students, a prominent religous figure in Penang was asked to say the 'talkin'. Pak Leh said that he can't read the 'talkin' for my grandfather, how can he tell this great man what to do, to remind him how to face God, there's no one worthy to do that for him.

Instead, he asked us all to join him in prayer for the deceased and then he addressed the group reminding us what a great man my grandfather was, the sacrifices he’s made in spreading knowledge in the name of glory of Islam, the ‘ilmu’ he has shared with the thousands lucky enough to be his pupil. He might be gone but his spirit lives on in a lot of us and it shall be passed on to our future generation. His passing is a great loss, but we all have to accept God's will of taking back what that has always been His.

Alhamdullilah, my grandfather at least got one of his final 'amanah', to be buried next to his wife of more than 40 years. The rest? Aahh well, we tried and we fought for him, but we lost. So there must be a very very good 'hikmah' that God didn't allow it.

La illa ha illa anta subhanaka inni kuntum minal zalimin.